My mates shift into dicks, throw their cocks around, lie to grow their penises... and raise hamburgers from the dead. I'm Storm, and my life has turned into a sausage party just when I need to save Silver Springs. It's a good thing I’m a raptor shifter, because detachable dicks ain’t gonna cut it.
Tropes to Watch Out For:
🦖 Enemies to Lovers
🦖 Fated Mates
🦖 Kick Ass Heroines
🦖 Love Reforms Villain
🦖 Older FMC
🦖 Unusual Shifters
🦖 Road Trip
From the creator of Sapphire and Juniper comes a brand new romance that you'll be embarrassed to read in public.
You thought flying dildos were mad? Wait until you meet the man who throws his dick around... literally! He'll give you new inspiration for your next naughty purchase.
Meet Riley Storm, a raptor shifter biker chick. Why does she shift into a dinosaur? She doesn't know. But her new fated mates are going to help her discover her forgotten past.
Her harem includes:
- A penis snake shifter.
- An octopus shifter who throws his dick at people he likes (some octopuses really do that!).
- A small pixie whose cock grows when he tells lies.
- A vegan necromancer who raises burgers from the dead, so she can create an army of zombie cows (no cock here! Storm is Silver Spring's first bisexual heroine).
When a group of alien hunters roll into town, convinced that the local supes are dangerous space invaders, Storm has to stop them with help from her mates and their not-quite-super powers. It's a good thing she's terrifying all on her own.
An Excerpt of Storm
“Eat my ass taco, you dick canoes!” I shouted as I drove my motorcycle in a tight circle in the middle of the skating rink.
The trees, shops, and people blurred as I zoomed by. My hands clenched the handlebars to wrestle the bike under control. Its brakes squealed on the ice, and my left foot slipped off the footpeg. The damn rental skates I wore made it hard to keep my feet on the bike. But I was still more graceful driving donuts on the ice than skating on it.
I had a vague memory of skating in full gowns on the river in Holland… I wanted to say one hundred years ago? I was good at it then, unless I was mixing the memory up with something I had seen on TV or in a movie. Vampires could remember centuries, maybe even millennium of events. The shifter and human brain… not so much.
Either way, it had been a long ass time since I had sucked droopy old man balls at something. I didn’t like it. So, I had grabbed my motorcycle.
“Woooo! Ass tacos!” I revved the gas, forcing the bike in a faster circle, making my stomach lurch. Fuck, maybe I shouldn’t have drunk all those beers.
“Miss, you need to pull over!” Liam the troll cop—or at least a blur who looked kind of like him—inched toward me with his hands out. “Someone could get hurt!”
Months of living and getting in trouble in Silver Springs had taught me one thing about the troll. He looked scarier than he was. So, I ignored him.
“Ass taco feast!” I shouted, a beer-flavored burp cutting me off.
“Oh no,” said a man’s voice from a reddish, grayish smudge. Something about that smudge made my heart skip a beat.
I hiccupped and hit the brake. The tires squealed as I forced the bike to a stop.
Once my head stopped spinning, his blur of red formed into a bushy beard and his blur of gray into a knitted sweater with a matching hat and mitts. He stood on the ice in black hockey skates. His blue eyes were wide as a butthole after an ass taco, and he gazed at me in a mix of wonder and horror.
I was used to people giving me that look.
What was new was that my heart did back-flips and then belly flops. I wanted to kiss him and suck him and cuddle him and—what the fuck? I must be drunker than I thought. Well, might as well roll with it and plow this hottie.
I leaned on my handlebars and smirked at him. “Do you know what an ass taco is?” I said in my best sultry voice. “That’s when you eat an ass like you would a taco—by spreading the outer part and licking the inside.”
He made a face as though struggling with something. “What kind of monster eats a taco by ignoring the shell?”
“A taco is like an ass or a pussy: The good stuff is on the inside.” I winked.
“Oh no, oh fuck. I knew I shouldn’t have come into town. Stupid!”
I stared at the front of his pants as they clung to a growing cock. “Do you always act horrified when a woman hits on you?”
“Yes!” he said.
My gaze jerked to his eyes. He gave me a look of tenderness, need, and fear. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard.
Ah, probably a virgin, I thought. Innocent. Naive. Not used to women making a meal out of him. Strange, though, when he was hot enough to melt the ice. The sweater couldn’t hide that his arms were thick and well-muscled.
Well, time to sweet talk the virgin until he wasn’t a virgin anymore.
I climbed off the bike to saunter toward him with my best smolder, but my skated feet shot out from under me. My ass hit the cold, hard ground, and my head thunked against my bike.
“Fucking skates,” I roared. I’d punch them except I was still wearing them. “Once I get you off, I’m going to cut you like a loaf of bread and then find your maker and cut them.” I leaned forward to unlace one of them. “One minute, Viking Virgin Man. Wait there and I’ll seduce you.”